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I think you have a pretty good understanding of what's going wrong in the relationship. Neither of you communicate at all.
And I think both of you are letting your emotions control the situation. Today I asked how he was as he had not sms first after 3 weeks and he replied 3 hours later saying "busy, you?. Leave her alone. She has another guy who genuinely likes her but you are screwing that up for her to feed your ego.
You're the bad boy unattainable cad who treats her poorly who she continues to chase for reasons of her own, probably rooted in low self esteem. Stop taking advantage of that.
It's not about dumping someone who has different standards. It's about not having to deal with an unforgiving person. And I didn't say he WAS emotionally abusive, just that people who are unforgiving about one thing are generally unforgiving about other things as well and so you'll likely transgress another of his rules at some point and suffer the same punishment. You're not a bad person for feeling this way. However, it's how you deal with the situation that will show what kind of person you really are.
I have been there. It took me awhile to really realize my action of sleeping with my ex when he had a gf. But I know he did have a good hand in it. I was wrong to do it and so is OP. But it's not easy. The last thing you would care about right after a breakup is your ex's new gf. I did not set my ex up but eventually they broke up coz he says he couldn't see me moving on. I did not believe him, neither did I give him another chance.